My girls are young. While my daughters are far from finished products, here are my thoughts, thus far, on the parenthood journey. In this three-part blog post series, I am going to address three things that I believe are important to consider in raising healthy, whole PKs: (1) Make sure there is consistency in what your children see on Sunday and what they see in the home every day. (2) Don’t have different expectations of behavior or levels of involvement in the church just because of their father’s (or your) profession. (3) Don’t allow other people to impose their expectations on your children. The first blog post will deal with consistency in our behavior.
Make sure there is consistency in what your children see on Sunday and what they see at home every day.
It is my greatest hope that our girls see Christ in me and their father on a regular basis. By no means does that mean either of us is perfect. My husband can be very impatient, and I can be very controlling. But, hopefully, my girls see an example of a loving relationship between us. More often than not, we talk to each other with respect, show kindness to one another, and look out for one another. After that, we demonstrate the same relationship with our girls. Often, many Christians can get comfortable with the fact that we don’t commit “big” sins: I don’t drink, smoke, do drugs, commit adultery, gamble, and the like. However, how we treat other people tells a story about our witness, as well.
Do your children hear you gossip about other people? Talk poorly about church people, or other family members?
How do you handle conflict or disagreement with your spouse, with your children, with the church, with others?
Do your children see you demonstrating compassion to other people?
How do talk to your spouse? Have your children seen you be snide, sarcastic, disrespectful or emasculating to your husband?
How do your children hear you talk to other people? The sales clerk who gave you poor service? The person who took your parking space?
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Shauntae Brown White is an associate professor in the Department of English and Mass Communication at North Carolina Central University. She is married to the Rev. Dr. Harry L. White, Jr., pastor of the Watts Chapel Baptist Church in Raleigh, NC.